Overcoming Social Anxiety: Tips for Navigating Social Situations with Confidence
Do you get overwhelmed thinking about spending time with other people? Do you find yourself avoiding certain social situations as much as possible out of fear of being judged or embarrassing yourself? Do you notice a significant drop in your anxiety when plans with others get canceled? You may struggle with social anxiety and the tips below can help you manage this anxiety more effectively, avoid social situations less (and even look forward to them), and feel secure in being your authentic self.
Focus on getting to know other people instead of being interesting.
Sure, fun people get positive attention from others. However, the people who really make strong connections are those who ask questions, listen, and take an interest in who they are talking to instead of being preoccupied with being interesting themselves.
Connect in a way that is fitting to you.
As an introvert I have mistakenly believed that I need to be outgoing and entertaining to be liked by others. While I can have moments like that, the main way I connect to others is by having deeper conversations and helping others feel more understood. Considering this, I have been able to shift my thinking from I need to chat with as many people as possible at a party, for example, to my social interactions were a success if I made just one strong connection with someone.
Own your awkwardness.
People feel more comfortable around someone that is not perfect. Furthermore, you being your authentic, awkward self can help a fellow awkward person feel more comfortable to be themselves and less alone. Taking this a step further, acknowledging your awkwardness or social missteps can actually make you feel more confident. This could be in the form of playfully making fun of yourself (not in a way that negatively affects your self-esteem). I have found people often respond warmly when I do this and also often relate to whatever I am making fun of myself about.
Learn about social cues and practice with a friend.
You can’t work with what you don’t know. Build your knowledge base on what different body language, facial expressions, tones of voice, and actions can mean. Practice this with someone you both feel comfortable with and think will provide you with tactful feedback about what you could do differently.
Have topics prepared to discuss ahead of time.
Take a minute to think about who will be at the event, what you know about their interests, and what you can easily and appropriately talk to anyone about whether they are 8 or 80. This will help conversations flow more easily and help you feel less put on the spot when you are trying to contribute to the conversation.
Fake it ‘til you make it.
We sometimes try to manage anxiety by trying to reframe our thoughts and then expect our physiological responses to follow. Sometimes though our emotions are so heightened we cannot think clearly and our minds are overtaken by negative self-talk. Particularly when this occurs, focusing on modifying the reactions in your body can be more effective at decreasing your anxiety than trying to change your thoughts. For example, when I am feeling particularly anxious, I make a conscious effort to slow down and sit still because this is how my body is when I am more relaxed. I have found my mood and thoughts tend to catch up when I do this, at least to a level that I am better able to reframe my concerns.
Practice mindfulness techniques.
Being grounded in the here and now can help you be less in your head, make more effective decisions regarding social interactions in the moment, and more correctly interpret others’ words and actions. Working with a trained therapist can particularly help you practice mindfulness and implement it effectively.
Find something to be excited about.
We often try and are encouraged to reach a state of calm when we are anxious. While feeling calm would be a much more pleasant state to be in, sometimes our anxiety level and circumstances make it difficult for us to reach such a state. This is because anxiety is a heightened emotion whereas calm is a much lower intensity emotion. Considering this, the pleasant emotion we can more easily achieve when we are very anxious is excitement.
Work with a professional.
A trained therapist can help you implement many of these tips, explore your insecurities, and feel more confident. The therapeutic relationship itself can even be a starting point in being your authentic self and opening up.
Although the types of interactions can vary, such as 1:1 vs group, we are naturally inclined to want and need to connect to others. Social anxiety can be a barrier to bonding with others and forming the relationships you want. Now that you have these tools, I am hopeful you can go into social situations with less anxiety, less avoidance, more enthusiasm, and more confidence.
Interested in More Support With Anxiety Therapy in Indianapolis, IN?
Take that courageous first step by seeking out a skilled anxiety therapist at Indiana Counseling and Resilience Center. Together, we can develop effective strategies to reduce stress and help you regain control of your life. Remember, you deserve a peaceful and fulfilling future, and anxiety therapy can be a powerful tool to help you achieve it. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
Contact us to schedule an appointment for anxiety therapy
Begin meeting with one of our skilled anxiety therapists
Start managing your anxiety symptoms in a healthy and positive way!
Other Services Offered at Indiana Counseling & Resilience Center
At Indiana Counseling & Resilience Center, our team wants the best for our clients and we want to support you in any way we can. So, in addition to anxiety therapy, our skilled team of skilled and caring therapists specializes in trauma & PTSD counseling, couples counseling, and EMDR therapy. We offer our services both in-person and online in the state of Indiana. For more about us check out our FAQs!
